Note To Self
by Suzaku's Rose
Summary: A Malfoy never turns down a challenge but when Blaise proposes something obseen, something impossible...can Draco do it? HarryXDraco SLASH
1. NTS Don't Trust Girls On Their Periods

**Well I must admit I have not been in for a little while because my last story got no feedback at all which must have meant it was not worth reading haha. So I am hoping that this story might possibly pose for a more interesting read. This is my first slash fic so beware for something possibly amateurish. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own any characters in this story. **

**AN - This is in the middle of their 6th year. SPOILER: Dumbledore is not dead yet. **

**Chapter 1: Note To Self: Never Be Alone With A Girl On Her Period, They're No Fun **

"No! You are positively ridiculous what a stupid question!" Draco spat.

"It was only a simple question dracy-poo!" Pansy retorted in protest, stroking his tie in hopes of forgiveness.

Draco swatted her hand away. "Well if you have to open that hideous mouth of yours please have something at least mildly worth listening to! Now get out! Do you think I get a face like this from sitting around listening to stupid questions? Out!"

Pansy got up and left in a huff leaving Draco lying on his back staring at the ceiling. He put his arm up to shield his eyes from the light that was now pouring into the window. Pansy had stayed around all night talking about how her idiotic parents were getting a stupid divorce and how she "couldn't stand the pain" and how "life wasn't fair," sentimental hogwash.

She seemed to notice that he was desperately ignoring her and asked me if there was "Another woman in his life" assuming that she was actually a woman IN his life. (Not to mention that he was shagging three or four other girls who each came in earlier that night.) All he wanted was a good shagging because that is the one thing she did well and for her to leave. And **of course **she just "happens" to have her period at the time, _Then; _she decides to offer the comment, "Maybe another man?"

By this point Draco was furious because not only did he not get what he wanted but now she was questioning his sexuality? Now all he had was his "party of five" and that was making him lose interest.

"I need a challenge." Draco decided. He brought his arm up to look at his watch which read 5:30. "Good Blaise will be awake." Draco thought and he got up to take a shower and then Blaise and he would start their weekly routine.

Every week Draco and Blaise would see how many girls that they could shag in a week. So far, their all time record was Draco seventeen and Blaise eighteen. (Much to Draco's dismay.) But even Draco could not deny Blaise's charm and extremely debonair good looks. He had dark skin and dark hair but very unusually striking green eyes that made any girl feel like she was someone important. And with the intelligence of someone in the ministry he could even make some of the professors swoon. Though Draco was never much for the older women (He loved breaking in the newbies.) It was fun to watch Blaise get out of taking tests and doing scrawls with just one look. (And that one look costs him seven galleons dammnit.)

Draco let the hot water wash over him. He made sure to stay in there an extremely long time so every other boy had to take a shower in water from the polar ice caps. It's not that Draco was a _mean _boy. He just found pleasure in other people's misfortune.

When it was 6:30 Draco got out of the shower and proceeded to get dressed into his high quality robes. (Nothing like those pathetic Weasleys wear.) And proceeded downstairs to the Slytherin common room. There he found Blaise reading: **How To Make A Cold-Hearted Bitch Into A Seductive Witch In 2 Hours! **Draco smirked and shook his head, typical Blaise Zambini. However, Draco did not have time to admire Blaise's…spunk. He had more important things to worry about, not being bored.

Draco walked up to Blaise and closed the book on Blaise's finger. After Blaise used some colorful language and whacked Draco upside the head they sat down and began discussing their plans for the week.

"Please give me something easier than last week Zambini. I had to shag Pansy five times and Cho eight just to get up to my weekly thirteen!"

Blaise waved a hand as if ignoring his last comment. "Don't get your knickers in a bunch Draco I just so happened to come up with a great plan for you, that is, if you have the balls enough to go through with it."

"Let's hope this is good." Draco thought. "Alright, Hit me."

"Are you into experimenting?" Blaise proposed.

"You know I am." Draco replied.

"Good, then I am sure you'll have no problem with this. Seduce the Weasley girl, go out with her and make her fall in love with you. Then, cheat on her with her then ex-boyfriend, Potter."

If Draco had had anything to drink at that moment he would have spit it out all over Blaise's face?

"With a boy! Though you can't really count Potter as a boy, but Blaise be reasonable!" Draco whispered in a harsh tone so no one else upstairs would hear him.

"Draco, Draco it's the perfect scandal! You can get the golden trio and two Weasleys with what, two shags? You know mudblood is still in love with Potter so you can get her furious, with the Weasley girl it's self explanatory how her brother is going to feel, just think of the lives you could ruin!" Blaise replied cheerfully. "Of course if you're not up to it…"

Draco could not resist a challenge, it was in his blood. In his damned Slytherin blood. But, shacking up with Potter? It's almost immoral! Hell, anyone shacking up with Potter is immoral. But Draco knew what would happen if he turned down a challenge.

Blaise, being as experimental as he is, has been trying to get into his pants since they were in 3rd year. So Draco, being arrogant, made a pact with Blaise stating, "If I ever turn down a challenge I'll shag you from sun up till sun down." And they shook on it, and a Malfoy never breaks a promise. And knowing how Blaise is if he EVER shacked up with him his arse would be sore until he was as old as Dumbledore and he couldn't have that.

Draco held out his hand reluctantly, and Blaise took it, knowing that this time he might finally get what he's been waiting for.

**TBC… **

**If you get a chance please R&R **


	2. NTS S&M IS NOT Sugar and Marshmallows

**Hello Everyone! Really sorry for the slow update but I have finally been able to get back into the writing scheme of things my writers block has healed I think...for now...I have started a new story called Have You Ever Listened To A Smile in the Kingdom Hearts section if anyone is interested. Also, the rating of this story might increase due to sexual content/language etc. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters affiliated with this fan fiction **

**Reviewers: **

**Person - Thank you for the information and feedback. I don't know if I will be able to make this chapter very long but definitely in further chapters the humor and length will ensue. **

**Lyonser - Thanks! Sorry for such a long wait! **

**TiredRaven - Yay! Kinky was what I was going for haha . **

**Unforgivable Curse Caster - Harry may be more different than he appears... **

**Chapter 2: Note To Self: Never, ever, EVER assume when Blaise brings up S&M he means Sugar and Marshmallows**

Draco paced. It was what he did. "How in the bloody hell am I going to do this so that Blaise will not penetrate my arse into oblivion?" He muttered as he quickly brushed his teeth and rushed down to the Great Hall for breakfast. 

"You know Draco...Blaise said suddenly coming up behind him without Draco's knowledge and gripping the side of his neck. Blaise quickly checked around the hall to make sure no one was looking. They were late to breakfast as is. Blaise bent down near Draco's ear and breathed softly into it..."Only boring people..get bored. Ever heard of S&M?" Draco shoved Blaise off of him. 

"You haven't won yet Zambini." Draco retorted. Then he thought wait...S&M isn't that what the lady had asked if he wanted in his hot chocolate the other day? Sugar and Marshmallows?

"Sugar and Marshmallows? What the fu-" Draco started and Blaise slammed him up against the wall one hand on his shoulder and the other gripping one of his belt loops.

"Sadomasochism. please let me know when you improve your vocabulary Draco. Intelligence makes things more interesting." Blaise whispered tight up against him.

Draco knew what that meant. And he also knew he would never confuse the two again. Ever.

"Impossible tasks don't need to be seen out until the end." Blaise responded seductively. "Why not just give up now?" 

Draco pushed him off... turned on his heel and stomped off. Wheels turning. He had to make this work. This didn't even have to do with Blaise anymore. This had to do with his pride, his honor, and the fact that his dick was two inches shorter than he told Blaise it was. 

Getting the Weasley girl wasn't exactly going to be hard. He knew of her infatuation but he was in fact THE Draco Malfoy. Wow, that sounds so nice it has to be repeated, THE DRACO MALFOY...yes like the sound of that, anyway, he was much better looking than that insufferable Potter. He just had to turn on the charm, the wit and the sniff "I am a poor lonely boy and my father hates me and I-I I just want to be good!" act and she'd be his in no time. 

He walked into the Great Hall and spotted her sitting on his lap feeding him "Newt Loops" He had to suppress a groan and then suddenly remembered something. "That girl and I have Advanced Potions together! I will simply tell Professor Snape she needs the touch of an older, wiser, handsomer man to keep her together in that class, after all she is young for it, even though she does have a knack for potions..." 

He walked past them and saw the four of them glare at him like he had just killed a kitten or something and he each gave them each a menacing glare back...with the exception of Ginny. He made his eyes go soft, like a puppy's and force out a shy, "crushing boy" smile and quickly hurried on to take his seat by Crabbe and Goyle. 

Ginny looked like she was in shock at what had just happened. "What the-" She started then she saw Harry's face and kept quiet. No one really knew this about Harry, but he was very possessive. If anyone as much as Dean looked at Ginny he got upset. "Don't worry about him Harry I am sure he just had...morning sickness or something." 

"If that was what morning sickness looked like, more women would want to get pregnant." Harry muttered angrily. 

"Harry!" snapped Hermione and she whacked him with her copy of the Daily Prophet. 

"What's wrong with Harry saying the word pregnant Hermione?" Ron asked after downing his second glass of juice. "It's not like it's a bad word or anything like-" 

Hermione stuffed a biscuit in his mouth. "We will have no talk of that either. I am trying to read and with you two spitting out profanities I won't even be able to get next week's homework done!" 

Ginny giggled and kissed Harry on the cheek which seemed to have calmed him down a bit. As Draco watched this he almost felt sorry for poor Harry...HAHAHA yeah right. 

"Wfft wrrr you dwnn ofvr there?" Goyle said with half an apple stuffed in his mouth. 

"Quidditch season is coming up I had to show Potter I meant business, that is what I was doing over there you stupid oaf." 

Crabbe looked like he was about to say something but his desire to shove every last morsel within thirty feet of him won out and he continued onto his fifth bowl of cereal which he was drowning with Pumpkin juice. 

Draco's first plan of action was in tact. Get them a little riled up, the go in for the kill when they aren't expecting it. 

Potions class today was going to be very interesting... 

**Sorry! I know it's short but I wanted to do a chapter dedicated to this potions class so it will probably be up within 2-4 days! Thanks please if you get a chance R&R!**


	3. NTS Anything Can Be Done In 5 Steps

**Hello Everyone! I am back again with another chapter of "Note To Self." I have really enjoyed getting back into this fan fiction thank you to everyone who has given me positive feedback on it and has added me to their story alert lists. **

**Disclaimer: I am merely a nerd in a basement, I own nothing **

**Reviewers: **

**phix27 - thanks! I hope you continue reading! **

**mr. 8.5 incher - I know who you are and where you live "flip your lights on and off" **

**red eyed dragon - thanks. I am trying to keep it light because I hate these angst Draco/Harry stories where (insert name here) gets raped and (insert name here) consoles and blah, blah, blah. Hope you enjoy this chapter!**

**Chapter 3: Note To Self - Any Girl Can Be Won Over By Draco's own personal guide: "Get Bitches With No Stitches" Written in 5 Easy Steps**

When breakfast ended Draco made his way out of the Great Hall and inconspicuously followed the Golden Trio and the Weaslette to where they were going. He later found out that Harry, Ron and Hermione had Care of Magical Creatures all together next to they said goodbye to Ginny and were out at the first door.

"Good" Draco thought. "Now time to put "destroy the lives of others while getting a good shag" plan into action. Ah the thrill of it all made him almost giddy inside."

Draco had put this plan into 8 steps. On to step one.

**Step One: To Make Girls Swoon Over You Like Fabio, You Must Become Like Fabio, Feel the Fabio Within You**

Draco saw the cover a romance novel that Pansy was reading and asked her where she got it. "It was some muggle book that my mother's friend gave her. It really juicy!" squealed Pansy.

"So who is that prepubescent girl on steroids with the hot chick on the front?" asked Draco assuming that it was a lesbian novel.

Pansy whacked him with her book "Dracy-poo! That's Fabio! He is soooo gorgeous! Look how he is discreetly whispering in that girl's ear as he saves her. He can get her with just one look!" She sighed "What I wouldn't GIVE for someone to whisper in MY ear like that."

Draco saw the perfect opportunity to put this plan into action when he "accidentally" nudged Mrs. Norris, Flich's cat, out in front of Ginny so she would trip over her.

"Oomph!" He heard Ginny say and Draco quickly grasped her, one hand on her should and the other around he waist so we could support her. He steadied her and leaned down very close to her ear, breathed first and said softly seductively and **discreetly**, "Are you alright? You were just about to fall there."

He say her neck turning red and saw it creep up to her face as he waited just a second too long to let her go.

" Hey Than-.. wait Malfoy?!." She exclaimed almost disbelievingly. "What the hell do you want?"

"You were falling, I didn't want you to get hurt."

"Why would you care whether I got hurt or not?" Ginny inquired incredulously.

"Chivalry isn't dead you know." replied Draco with a small grin.

He then put step two of his plan into play.

**Step Two: Whip out the "Walk Away, Turn Shoulder Head Nod" Card (If you play this write you can win the "Can I Ever Repay You?" Chip.)**

Draco started to walk slowly in the directions of his Potions class when he heard Ginny call after him, "Wait! Malfoy!"

He turned his shoulder slightly, "Yes?"

"Thanks, I mean it, sorry about, you know...I owe you one." He could see the blush envelop her cheeks again.

He gave a small head nod and then continued to walk to class. "Score." He thought maliciously.

Draco arrived in class earlier than everyone else and proceeded to swiftly talk to his potions master.

"Hello Sir." Draco said as politely as he could manage.

"Malfoy." Snape said with a nod. "What is it?" Snape knew by now the only time Draco was ever this polite was when he wanted something.

Time for Step 3.

**Step 3: Male Tutors Are Sexy. They Appear To Be Smart and Charitable. **Pretend To Be Smart and Charitable Whenever Possible 

"I know that mid terms are coming up sir." Draco started. "And Ms. Weasley is young for this class, and I think she might need an older, wise someone to help her. She is good at potions but... you know their family has a knack for being...clumsy."

Snape took a trip down memory lane as he remembered all of the times Ron screwed up something in his potions class and gave a shudder.

"Alright Mr. Malfoy." Responded Snape finally. "Just don't let it interfere with your studies, you are my top student."

Draco grinned. "I assure you sir, it is absolutely no trouble at all."

"Alright Everyone." Snape began in a low drawl. "Your mid term is coming up soon and as we all know, hardly any of you are going to pass." Snape's lip curled when he saw the moans and groans of his students.

"This week will be a review of everything you have learned up until now. I will pair you up as follows: Longbottom and Patil, Brown and Finnigan, Malfoy and Weasley..."

Draco saw Ginny turn to him and then quickly turn away in fear that he might of seen her staring.

Draco moved his things over to where Ginny was sitting and he saw her rummaging around in her bag for a quill but she seemed to come up empty. He quickly whipped one out of his pants pocket along with some ink and set it next to her. "You can use mine."

She looked at him and he laughed inside his thoughts, "She really needs a way to figure out how to not be so damned obvious, guys never want to be laid by an easy girl. Wait...yes they do! What am I thinking?"

"Thanks. I guess I owe you another one Malfoy..." She mumbled, sounding slightly defeated.

Blaise did do something that Draco didn't even think about. There are years upon years of hatred writhed up in this girl just because of her little Pot Head. He would have to break down those walls in order to appeal to her.

That is why there is Step 4:

**Step 4: Establish a "Don't worry I am your friend. (Very hot friend, that is.)" Atmosphere. That way she will feel safe when you take her into your bed and have your way with her.**

"You can call me Draco...if you want." Draco mumbled trying to mimic the same shy tone Ginny had used before.

They began working this was a rather simple potion for Snape to assign the first day of review. Maybe now he was paranoid about people breaking things. "LONGBOTTOM! " He heard Snape bellow, Okay, maybe not that paranoid...

The entire class period ran rather smoothly, Ginny and Draco worked surprisingly well together and were actually able to have a decent conversation. (Score one for Draco.) Draco began to see the changes made in Ginny facial features when she talked to him. And how she seemed to laugh at anything that he said. "Wow, this was easier than I thought." Draco was thinking as he added the last ingredient, "Eye of Newt" to the mix.

Snape went around to check everyone's potion and it seemed as if Ginny and Draco were the only ones to get it completely correct. When Snape signaled that class was over he motioned Ginny and Draco to come to his desk.

"Ms. Weasley this midterm is very difficult and due to the age you are Mr. Malfoy has volunteered to tutor you for the rest of the week. Do not take advantage of his kindness."

Ginny looked as if she was about to protest when she saw Snape's face and knew there was no room for argument.

As soon as they were out of the classroom Ginny blew up. "GRR! I am so pissed off at that annoying git! Why does he think I was even put in that class at my age in the bloody first place! URGH! That bogger. Sorry to make you go through this Mal-…Draco."

"Don't worry about it Ginny." Draco commented nochalantly. "Just tell me what time is good for you." Draco then added an imaginary charitable notch to his point grid.

"Well after dinner will probably be best...Harry I am sure won't mind.." Ginny replied completely unconvinced.

"Just tell him that you have tutoring, details are unimportant." Draco said and then smiled.

Ginny blushed and nodded. "Why don't we meet in the Room of Requirement?"

Draco nodded in consent and thought, "This is almost too easy."

And finally Draco was able to put Step 5 of his plan into action:

**Step 5: A Kiss on the Hand Leaves an Imprint on the Mind**

Draco takes her hand and kisses it. "Well until then." he said and gave her a sly grin and walked away knowing his ass looked hot in uniform pants. He could hear her sigh behind him.

"This is almost too easy." Draco thought and grinned. "Be ready to eat your words Zambini."

After dinner was only six hours away.

**Wow! Long chapter for me. Thanks for reading I will probably be updating within 2-4 days again! Bye! Please R&R if you can!**


	4. NTS Always Have A Follow Up 3 Step Plan

**Hello Everyone! I am back with another chapter of "Note To Self" This one is probably going to be pretty short but I hope to have some longer chapters up in the near future. **

**Disclaimer: Owns Nothing, never has, never will **

**AN - I noticed I have been getting a lot of Author Alerts, in which I am very grateful but if you don't mind, the people who have added me to that list if you don't mind reviewing, so I can know what you liked and what you didn't, I would really appreciate it. **

**Reviewers: **

**Vilon - Haha I am glad you didn't completely deplore it. It is a D/H fan fiction, it just has not reached that point yet, there is plenty of humor to be shared, love scenes to be had and bests to be made before then, I hope to get it there as quickly as you would like **

**bittersweetsea- Thanks I am glad you like my perverted sense of humor, the last three steps will take place in this chapter **

**Minerva Rose - Awesome! Which friend? I am really glad you like it, I do sincerely hope to see some more of that uniform pants wearing Draco in the 5th movie. Thanks for reading hope to hear from you soon. **

**the masked unit - I know the chapters are not the most detailed things in the world ;;; when I was writing, I was really concerned with the humor. Thank you for your critique! **

**phix27- Here are the next 3 steps for you, thanks for coming back! **

**red eyed dragon - Haha I want someone to use the steps on me too...lol don't worry! We don't need to pout of in corners we have fan fiction! (Or so we lead ourselves to believe --) haha **

**Chapter Four - Note To Self - Always have a 3 step follow up plan to your 5 step "Bitches With No Stitches Plan" The number 8 sounds cool, you can completely lure them into your trap and it is the size of ahem certain appendages... **

**(AN - Psshh...you wish Draco) **

The rest of the day went by smoothly for the dearly beloved (cough, cough, splutter, splutter) Draco Malfoy. He made his way down to the Great Hall, making sure he had Crabbe and Goyle were following behind him in a Charlie's Angels-esq like way, so as to make him look more powerful.

He spotted Ginny wave to Harry who was already in the Great Hall with his mouth wrapped around a turkey leg as if it was the last thing he was ever going to eat. Right before Ginny had the chance to move forward Draco Malfoy put step six of his plan into play.

**Step 6: Light Shoulder Touch, Whisper and Wink. It Makes Them Think You Are Actually Smart and Caring, Wondering What You're Thinking About. (Which of COURSE Can't Be Sex HAHAHA)**

Draco seemlessly steps behind Ginny and rests hand gently on her shoulder. "See you tonight, don't forget, I really hope you were able to work things out." He saw Ginny look at him with her mouth slightly open as if in an awe like trance and his superior beauty to the world. He then winked and motioned for Crabbe and Goyle to follow him and they feel in step as Dylan Sanders and Alex Munday. (Which one is which, the world may never know...)

Draco enjoyed the feast but made sure he ate in a mild manner so he didn't smell like discarded farm animals after wards. As the meal came to a close he reached into his pocket and brought out a container of "Magic Mints" guaranteed to make anyone who inhaled your oxygen be lustful towards you, but only for an hour. "Enough time for a tutoring session." Thought Malfoy as he popped two into his mouth, the more mints you eat, the more powerful it becomes. "Blaise said nothing about using edible charms..."

Draco had talked to Blaise yesterday in the Slytherin common room, discussing his progress. "It is like she is wrapped around my finger!" Draco boasted in a slightly fake manner.

"Oh come of it Draco, we both just know it's a little tutoring session, I, on the other hand, could make much better use of your time..." Blaise drawled.

"Yeah, by paying the money you owe me when I win." Draco retorted. They had added this to the deal the other night, Draco had felt as if he was getting nothing out of this deal but the misfortune of others (which was fabulous and all) but the two horrible shaggings kind of canceled the whole, make-the-world-a-more-horrible-place-for-all-people thing. And since Draco knew that Blaise had enough money to bathe in it, he obliged to a 50 Galleon prize.

"If you win Draco, don't get all hot and bothered." Blaise said, completely dismissing Draco's anger as if it were simply an annoying fly on his shoulder.

Draco got up all in a tizzy and stormed out of the Slytherin common room. He hated when Blaise did that, made him feel insignificant, just because he was handsomer, smarter...URGH! NEVERMIND!

As finally came to an end and people were filing out of the Great Hall, he saw Potter tell Ginny he would catch up with her later because he had a Seeker's meeting. However, Draco knew perfectly well the seeker's didn't have meetings, or he would have been invited. But Ginny believed him none the less.

He saw Potter meet up with Chang, and quickly exit the hall.

Considering Draco did have some time before him and the Weaslette had to meet he decided to do a little investigative journalism and follow the two. The went up the stairs to the second floor to a classroom that used to be used by Professor Grubby-Plank before she had been moved to the position of Care of Magical Creatures for a while. Now, it was being used as a storage closet for various potions, scrawls, inkwells and cauldrons.

He saw them quickly look around and then shuffle themselves in and close and lock the door. Draco, knew a charm taught to him by Snape however, to view things behind such trivial items as doors. "Yarxcio" Draco whispered and his wand ignited. It worked very similarly to a flashlight. Any time he pointed it anywhere it would create a circle only not shine light but reveal what was behind what he was looking at. (Draco had found this very useful during his classes when he saw one of his female classmates get up and walk past him.)

As Draco peered into the supply closet he saw that Harry Potter - The Boy Who Lived - on top of a sprawled out Cho Chang on top of three desks, snogging.

Draco never felt anything like this in his life, he was so shocked, so surprised, so...proud! "Wow I would have never known Potter had it in him! I guess we can now call him "The Boy Who Was Short-Lived"" Draco thought laughing at his own joke as he muttered a spell that can capture an image and then make it reappear like a slide show. His non-existent heart swelled as he saw Potter starting to remove her clothing and sniffed, "Sweet little Potter, all grown up and about to get dumped!"

But Draco stayed a little longer than he had to. He found himself looking just a second longer than he had to. Not at Chang, but at Potter. "Wow.." Draco whispered before he could stop himself as Harry used his teeth to rip off the buttons on Cho's shirt. "What the fuck was that?" He hit himself in the head left in a hurry knowing he had to meet Ginny shortly. He shouldn't be looking at Potter! He had lives to ruin! Draco blew it off as a fluke and he must just be looking at the enemy for a weakness as to when he can strike. He went on to step number seven.

**Step 7: **CD - Consolable Dirt. Dig up Things On Other People, Pretend You Found It By Accident, And Then Console Them, They'll Think You're Sensitive 

By the time Draco had arrived Ginny was already in the Room of Requirement. She had lined shelves with books on potions and had a set up lab station right in the middle of the room with the steps for the potions and the ingredients and method.

When Draco walked in, he tried to look as sullen as possible, as if something was really bothering him, so Ginny would notice his poor little puppy face and ask him what's wrong.

"What's the matter Draco?" Ginny inquired.

Draco sighed in that, "Oh woe is me" way. "I think you should sit down."

With those words spoken a long black leather couch appeared in the left hand corner of the room. Draco motioned towards the seat and Ginny sat down wondering what was going on.

Draco sighed again. "I really don't know if I should be the one telling you this, it's really not my business to be saying this, but you are just so..." Draco cut himself off knowing she would be leaning in at this point wondering what she was.

Draco removed his wand from his cloak pocket and said, "Projectoro." And it reflected the image of Harry and Cho together.

He watched as Ginny's mouth fell open and tears started streaming out of her eyes. But they looked...fake for some reason. As if she was trying really hard to look pathetic.

"Oh DRACO!" She cried and buried herself into his shoulder. He patted her lightly and proceeded on to the last step of his sure fire plan.

**Step 8 - And When You Have Them In Your Grasp...Lean In **

He cupped Ginny's face in his hand, which appeared to have stopped streaming. She closed her eyes a little longer than necessary and opened them again. Draco leaned in and watch Ginny do the same. "Step One completed." he thought.

Draco locked the door, leaving all studying materials untouched.

Other materials well...that is a different story.


	5. NTS Moral Morning Syndrom Must Die

_**Hello Everyone! Sorry this chapter has been so delayed. There has been a lot of things going on and I am afraid that this chapter will be the last one for at least a week because I am going to be going on vacation and my parents are taking away my phone and there are no computers. So probably 10 days or so before the next update TT really sorry about that. Thank you for all the new Author Alert adds and reviews! Also sorry for this chapter's length it had to be short for what is coming up in the chapter after it.**_

_**Disclaimer - Owns Nothing**_

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**_AN - At the end of this chapter people might have a couple of questions, there are a few things that I would like to addresse. _**

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**_1 - This is a DRACO/HARRY fan fiction. _**

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**_2 - Draco IS NOT going to turn into some sentimental little pansy as this story plays out. He is evil. He is devious. He is sexy. And he likes it that way._**

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**_3 - The next chapter is going to be his week with Ginny. It will be up when I return from vacation_**

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**_4 - This chapter had to be short in order for this sequence of events to commence._**

_**Reviewers:**_

_**Kindali Sidera - heck yes he is! Draco is like Angelina Jole...with nicer lips**_

_**red eyed dragon - Sorry to keep you waiting so long! If I could've reached a computer any faster I would have honestly! Hope this is what you've been waiting for**_

_**"The Dude" - If you want the real steps. Or if any of you do. That would actually work with someone who is not as hot as Draco (which is 99.9 of the population) shoot me an e-mail**_

_**Hikari Nightengale - Glad you liked it! **_

_**phix27 - Haha thanks. I hope you can follow my randomness without exploding**_

_**wIthOUt A nAmE - Awesome! I will! Thanks!**_

_**StephTheDuke - Yeah, Damn Harry! We'll get him back though... :) don't worry about that.**_

_**Reigen Doki - Haha glad I could be of service**_

_**Minerva Rose - Oh! that's cool. Yay fan fiction friends! Much love to you too!**_

**_Chapter 5 - Note To Self - No Matter How Good The Sucking Was Last Night It Is Nothing Compared To How Bad It Sucks When A Girl Has "Moral Morning Syndrome"_**

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Draco awoke before Ginny did and saw her naked sleeping frame wrapped around him. "Well it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be...better than a pig... more or less." He tried to move but he saw Ginny stir and thought otherwise. But it was too late, Ginny shut her eyes tightly for a second, blinked and opened them. "W-what the bloody hell? Where am I?" She turned to see Draco and her eyes widened. She shut then opened again, rubbed them to make sure she wasn't dreaming. Draco was getting annoyed. 

"Yes, yes, yes. It happened." Ginny looked like she was about to cry but Draco put a finger to her lips. "Shh..." He said as gently as he possibly could because he wanted to get out of here as soon as possible and tell Blaise the first half of there bet had been completed so that he could laugh in Blaise's face. "It'll be our little secret. Potter will never have to know about it, after what he did..." 

It suddenly came rushing back to Ginny and her eyes her eyes swelled up even more. "OH! How could I possibly do this to him! No matter _what _he did, I still love him! OH! How horrible I am!" 

**"OH **great." Draco thought. "The Weaslette has "Moral Morning Syndrome." 

For those less sexually active than Draco is, when some tart cheats on her sod off boyfriend and wakes up and gets those "guilt" eyes, she has moral morning syndrome. As if she completely forgot the reasons why she cheated on him in the first place. When Draco happens to run into these types of girls who have these _insufferable _**morals, **he tries to get out of the situation, FAST. 

Draco got out of bed and dressed quicky. "W-where are you going?" Ginny whimpered. Draco looked her square in the eye. 

"Look I won't tell if you won't." Draco lied. 

Ginny nodded in agreement. 

"Don't forget, we have tutoring same time next week." 

He could see Ginny mentally scolding herself to never let this happen again. He rolled his eyes, yeah, they all say that don't they? 

Draco unceremoniously tossed Ginny her close and quickly exited the Room of Requirement in search of Blaise, he found him sitting in the Slytherin common room reading yet another one of his famous sex books. 

"Which one is it this time?" Draco asked shutting the Slytherin common room door behind him. 

"A book about how to make the blackboard in Binn's class show porn but only to me when I am uninterested in listening to his banter." 

Draco was really interested now and wanted to ask how it worked but he had more important matters to discuss. 

"I slept with the Weasley girl." Draco said triumphantly. 

Blaise rolled his eyes and tossed a bottle to him. 

"What is this?" 

"This is a truth potion, you think I trust you?" 

"Hey! I am your best mate!" 

"Who is a cheating, lying snobby man whore." 

"True...but so are you!" 

"True." 

Draco took a swing and Blaise asked him if he had slept with the Weasley girl. Draco responded with a nod and Blaise tossed him a second bottle causing the effects of the truth potion to be cancelled out. 

Draco took a swing of that and sat down. "See? Half of this bet has already been completed and you thought you were going to-" Blaise started to laugh. 

"WHAT?!" Draco said exasperated, annoyed now. 

"Oh Draco, Draco, you seem to have forgotten a certain part of our deal." 

"No I didn't now I have to do..."Draco shuttered. "Unspeakable things with Potter." 

"You actually have to lead her on and date her Draco, dear." Blaise said and rolled his eyes. 

"WHAT?!" 

"I said "make her fall in love with you." I meant it. But don't worry, I'll let you off the hook easy, because I am sure the shagging was well...less than desireable...would have been much better with me. Anyway, you only have to date her for a week, if of course, you can stand it that long." 

Draco thought back to the night him and Blaise made their deal and realized Blaise did say that. He sighed exasperated. 

"She had "moral morning syndrome!"" Draco whined. 

Blaise laughed wickedly. "Ouch. Guess you'll really have to woo her then...Or..." 

"Shut up!" 

Draco stalked upstairs into the boys dormitories and sprawled himself out on his bed thinking. 

"It's only one week right? She's won't get on my nerves that bad in a week right?" 

Draco did not know how wrong he was. 


	6. NTS HELL WEEK

**_Hello Everyone! Wow...I was on vacation longer than I had expected. Sorry for the delay. Here is chapter six of Note To Self! It may be kind of rough! I didn't get a chance to BETA it because I wanted it out ASAP_**

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**_Disclaimer - As You Know, As I Know, I Own Nothing_**

**_Reviewers:_**

**Vilon - Hi again! Thanks for reviewing more than once..I really wish more people would review..but the adds are good too. Yes one week with Gina...poor, poor Draco. How come you don't like her anymore? Sorry for the delay...we were on vacation longer than I thought.**

**red eyed dragon - Because Harry is a man whore! **

**animegurl088 - Thanks! Hope to hear from you soon.**

**Hikari Nightengale- Yes..but he is a hot ass.**

**RedSoxChic193 - Thanks! Sorry for the delay!**

**phix27 - Thanks Yes...poor Moral Morning Syndrom..happens to the best of us**

**princess cythera - Thanks! I will!**

**Reddhottmustang - Thanks! Sorry for the delay!**

**Aquababy14 - Hahaha yeah a pervert runs through my veins...it's why my mind is in the gutter!**

**Kindali Sidera - Yes...I wish it didn't exist..but Ginny won't feel it for long ...hell yes he does! Sorry for the delay!**

**_Chapter 6 - Note To Self:_ _A Week With Ginny Weasley Is Like A Night of Bad Sex : Slow, Painful, Unsatisfying_**

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Draco and Blaise walked down the hall together to potions when they passed McGonnagall in the hall. Blaise turned and murmured to Draco, "Watch this." Draco eyed Blaise as he walked out in front of the transfiguration teacher and bowed slightly. "Afternoon Minerva." 

"Zambini you know very well you are instructed to call me 'Professor"." McGonnagall snapped without much conviction. 

"Oh but ma'am the name just rolls off the tongue like, waves on the ocean. Speaking of the ocean," He pulled out a small vile from his pocket. "Here is the sea water you told me to turn into a minnow." 

McGonnagall stared at him wide-eyed. That was the final exam for them that spring. Liquid into solid. 

Blaise took her by hand and opened it palm up and handed it to her and enclosed her fingers around it. "It can be our secret." He grinned. 

McGonnagall sighed. "Very well. You will not have to do homework this week, as agreed. Good afternoon...Blaise." And she scurried off. 

Draco stared at him, wide-eyed. McGonnagall never called any students by their first name. Ever. Blaise smirked at Draco. 

"Well that covers this weeks Transfiguration homework. But I am really going to have to woo her now, considering Christmas holidays are coming up, she is going to pound our brains in. Jeez, stop staring at me like that Draco, people will suspect..." He trailed off and smirked. 

Draco raised his hand to whack Blaise on the side of the head but Blaise caught his wrist and kissed it lightly. 

Draco whipped his hand from Blaise's grasp and stalked off. 

"Good luck with the Weaslette this week!" Blaise called to Draco's back. 

Draco continued to walk away from Blaise but muttered, "bloody man whore." under his breath. 

Blaise's expert hearing picked it up and called back to him, "That's MR. Man whore!" 

Draco was paired up again with Ginny that afternoon in potions class. Draco requested the back of the classroom as to help "teach" Ginny in a more private setting. Ginny was not pleased with this because Draco could see how hard it was for her to keep her hormones down to a reasonable level. 

When Draco as in the Great Hall this morning he saw Ginny eyeing Chang in a malicious way as she sat on Potter's lap feeding him. Potters's mind however was obviously elsewhere which got Ginny so infuriated that she stuffed five pieces of toast into Harry's mouth at once, causing him to choke, and stormed off leaving an "almost" dying Harry, unfortunately, spluttering up small pieces of bread, which caused Hermione to give him the Heimlich maneuver, which cause spit and bread to splatter all over the elder Weasley! It was priceless really. 

Ah, the ruining of people's lives, it got him all giddy on the inside. 

Draco figured by this point Ginny was not really concentrating on the potion and more on where Potter's "wand" and where he was putting it. She caused the potion to spill green ooze and then explode into Snape's face as he walked by. This ghastly reaction with his face caused it to morph into a rather accurate impression of Professor Umbridge, only his nose was still the same. 

"Weasley!" He/She boomed in a high pitch voice. "Detention!" 

She ground and pointed her wand at her potion to make it vanish, zero marks for the day. 

Draco caught up with Ginny after class and she started to walk faster when with cat like reflexes he grabbed her wrist and as fast as the flick of a wand he had her up against a wall in a secluded corridor. He had pinned her wrists together with one hand above her head and his other hand was holding her chin in place, so she was looking straight at him. 

"You've been avoiding me." He growled trying to sound seductive and angry at the same time so she would fall under his spell. Trying to utilize his 8 step plan. However, this failed when the image of Blaise doing him in the arse came to mind. 

"Look Weasley. If you want to make Potter jealous than this is what you have to do. A week, and he'll be back into your arms and all that...whatever." Blaise never said how he had to do it. 

Ginny did not deny she wanted to make Harry jealous and he could see the image of Cho and Harry playing in her mind like a hamster on a wheel. 

"Deal. Why are you even helping me anyway?" 

"What you don't believe it is for my loving generosity? My sweet sensitive nature?" 

"You've never had any of those." 

"Oh right." 

They agreed. On a purely business level that is. Or that's what he thought. But these days would not settle well with Draco. Not settle well at all. 

(AN - For Draco's sake I will not recollect in detail every single account of the horrors that Ginny put him through that week. This is his summary.) 

**Draco's Week Of Indescribable Hell...Enjoy**

**Day 1 - Ginny dragged him through the Great Hall like a puppy on a leash.**

**Positive - Harry could not take his eyes off of them**

**Negative - Draco's wrist was swollen for at least two weeks proceeding the event**

**Day 2 - Ginny INSISTED that they kiss between the classes her and Harry shared (Draco gagged and spluttered at even repeating these words. This girl had the mouth of a walrus and the tongue of a sick, swollen walrus.)**

**Positive - This caused Harry to trip and fall into the mud after Care of Magical Creatures. Which was the only joy Draco got that week.**

**Negative - Ginny bit his tongue. Enough said.**

**Day 3 - Ginny sat on his lap in the Great Hall at the Slytherin table.**

**Positive - It caused Pansy to go into shrieks of hysterics**

**Negative - Draco can no longer feel his legs under her weight**

**Day 4 - Ginny partnered herself with him in every class they had together**

**Positive - This caused Ron's ears to become a shade of puce, he leaned to close to the burner trying to listen to their conversation and his hair caught on fire. Granger had to put him out.**

**Negative - Ginny talked his ear off until his own ear was a shade of puce**

**Day 5 - When Ginny and him were sitting outside on the grounds she would sing to him**

**Positive - Harry started yelling to Ron that Ginny only sang to him**

**Negative - ...Ginny's singing resembles two cats fighting over a dead fish in a bathtub with an iron in it.**

**Day 6 - Draco takes Ginny to Hogesmade**

**Positive - Harry FINALLY says he needs to speak to Ginny**

**Negative - Draco had to slip fire whiskey into Harry's drink for it to happen and that cost him seven galleons**

**Day 7 - Draco and Ginny "break up"**

**Positive - Draco got to be the one to break poor Ginerva's heart**

**Negative - Now he had to fuck Potter up the arse.**

Draco walked into the Slytherin common room and slunk down into a chair. That was the WORST week of his life. The only one he could think of that could've been any worse was when he had to take muggle studies until his father was able to bail him out of it. 

Draco heard a slow clapping from the other side of the room. 

"Bravo Draco, Bravo. I am impressed you were actually able to pull this off." 

He sat down on the arm rest of the chair Draco was sitting and put his arm around him in a draping fashion. 

"So how are you going to complete the other end of our bargain?" 

He looked at Draco and laughed. "You look like you have just been raped in Azkaban, what is wrong with you mate?" 

Draco glared at Blaise, it was bloody him who got him into this. 

"Don't worry mate, in one more week it'll be over...unless you want to give up." 

Draco knew he wasn't going to give up. However this week, unlike his week with Ginny, would pose more than just a little interesting... 


	7. NTS Don't Trust Blaise

_Hello Everyone! I am glad to have received such positive feedback on this story. It has really been my summer outlet for all of my dirty humor. Well here is chapter 7 of: Note To Self!_

_A/N - A few announcements:_

_I have decided that this chapter will focus more on Blaise and Draco. Harry's week will be much more drawn out that Ginny's week was._

_I would honestly like to know how many people want Draco to end up with Blaise instead of Harry. I honestly didn't think that would end up happening, I thought people would just be waiting for the gay man sex, but obviously...so I would just like to know what you all think and this story might have an alternate ending...I don't know, I will just have to see what comes._

_Thanks!_

_Reviewers:_

_Forsake Elf - You light up my life my darling. I cannot wait to see you. _

_Corvin - - I am glad I am keeping you on the edge of your seat. Thanks! The idea just sort of came to me one morning in one perverted swoop...haha_

_red eyed dragon - You know...you are pretty much amazing I really appreciate you actually taking the time to review each chapter...you're pretty much awesome. 3 Glad you're still reading_

_Kindali Sidera - Well I hope Draco realizes that in due time! He should be he is getting privileged here! Regards to your PS - OO I should look that up! If they do...do you think they gift wrap?_

_angels-songwriter - I will continue the sexy banter of COURSE! I think a lot of the humor comes from that...other than Draco's ignorance and sarcastic nature. Glad you liked the kiss on the wrist thing, I added that at the last minute. I am glad you like the humor too, I really don't like stupid humor and I am surprised to see a lot of people share my sense of humor as well! We should all just have a sexy Draco convention and meet each other...Thanks for putting me in your alerts!_

_Hikari Nightengale - Haha Draco doesn't know what he's in for...Maybe Draco should have his own cheering squad..._

_bellajen94 - Here is your update!_

_Lynn Miller - Thanks for reviewing Glad you actually laughed instead of just looking and being like...I need to call this girl to a phsyc ward. yay! we have similar senses of humor! Hope to see you in later chapters!_

_princess cythera - Thanks I didn't want to draw that out too much, so I am glad you liked it. Here's the next chapter for you._

_AN - This chapter will be short, I am very sorry for this fact. The reason it is so short is because writer's block is infesting my brain and I need to back track and see where I am going with this, so I will be updating more frequently, with shorter chapters._

**Chapter 7 - Note To Self: **

**Never Be Alone With Blaise In The Slytherin Common Room At Five O'Clock In The Morning...**

That morning Draco decided to dress quickly and beat Blaise down to the common room at five o'clock that morning.

As Draco reached the bottom step to his utter disgruntle he found Blaise fully dressed and calm reading another one of his insufferable novels.

"Stupid bloke always beats me at everything." Draco thought. He took a seat down opposite of him.

"What is it this time?" Draco inquired unable to see the cover because Blaise held the book in his lap.

"This?" Blaise inquired lazily. "Oh it's called, "Time of the Month: Divide and Conquer." You are up early..."He commented.

Draco didn't want Blaise to know the real that he was down there so he simply retorted, "I couldn't sleep."

Blaise put his book down gingerly and strode over to Draco and bent down close to his ear. "Concerned about who's going to be "on your arse" soon?" Blaise chuckled at his own play on words.

Draco swatted him with a copy of the Daily Prophet sitting on the stand next to him. "For your information Zambini, I already have a plan to reel in Potter." he lied.

Blaise got behind Draco in his seat. Draco didn't like that. Blaise draped both his arms over Draco's shoulders. "Do you now?" He murmured in his ear, getting so close Draco could feel his hot breath on the nape of his neck.

"What is this oh so extravagant plan on yours?"

Draco tried to regain control by moving his head slightly away from Blaise's mouth. "No business of yours."

Blaise chuckled and bent down close quickly and bit Draco's ear lob gently. But before Draco had any time to retaliate Blaise was already heading out the door. "Send me an owl when you give up." Blaise called loftily behind him and shut the door.

Draco was fuming. Half because Blaise was right, and half now Draco could see why Blaise had shagged more girls than him. Damn him and his stupid intelligence and charm and appendages...

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Draco began pacing up and down thinking about new ways to get Potter under his spell. He knew that the only way he was going to be able to do this is if he did something with that Chang girl..."If Potter catches me doing something with both of his whores maybe he'll wonder what I've got." Draco laughed, he already knew what he had, looks, charm, intelligence, well, everything really.

Draco sighed and smiled, he amazed himself sometimes.

As he made his way down to the Great Hall he made a note to whack Blaise upside the head as he made his way over to sit between Crabbe and Goyle. Blaise eyed him and Draco sighed mentally. He was going to pay for that later.

He figured one day those two, meaning Crabbe and Goyle might become lovers out of stupidity and desperation and the fact that the only ones that would love them are their mothers and even they didn't like them very much.

Draco glanced over to the Gryffindor table and saw Harry giving very possessive looks to anyone who even so much as passed a quick stare to the Weaslette, even Weasley.

As his eyes wandered over to the Ravenclaw table he founded a very disgruntled Cho pouting off towards the very end of the table with her red-headed friend. Another plan began to unfurl in his head.

The Yule Ball was arriving shortly. He would simply ask Cho to go with him. He was so handsome and charming and debonare she had to say yes right?

He checked behind himself to make sure his ass still looked hot, which, of course, it always did, and he grabbed an apple and crossed the Great Hall, deliberately past the Ravenclaw table and brushed past Cho lightly.

When she looked up, he winked.

He exited the Great Hall, as he looked back out of his peripheral vision and saw three pairs of eyes follow him out of the Great Hall, Cho (probably out of astonishment) Blaise (probably because he was looking at his arse) and Potter's...


	8. NTS Hair is the key to sex

_Hello everyone! I am here with Chapter 8 of Note To Self! I would like to take this time to tell a funny story; it's short don't worry._

_WELL I was at work, I work at a day care and there weren't a lot of kids in there so I started to work on this story long hand. I had gotten to an ahem explicit part when one of the little kids wanted me to read a book to them and then they picked up the paper and looked like they were reading it and I snatched it from them as said, "NO NO NO NOT FOR YOU!" And then when I left I had realized...I LEFT IT THERE! So...I had to go back and get it and it was with other papers of mine ;;;; it was pretty embarrassing._

_MOVING ONWARD!_

_AN - Is not JK in disguise tears WOULDN'T IT BE AWESOME IF SHE WAS REALLY A FFN WRITER IN DISGUISE SO SHE COULD GET ALL OF HER SLASH FEELINGS OUT?! Ah...wishful thinking..._

_Oh! One more note: My birthday was on the 19th _

_Sorry this took so long...AP US History is killing me..._

_Reviews:_

**_Akkalia - Haha Ginny says she appreciates you standing in her defense. Nah...I played her up for this particular fic. Thanks for reading!_**

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**_Asyu - Thanks! Sorry for the long wait! YAY POCKY! What kind of pocky?_**

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**_bellajen94 - haha oh yeah Blaise can go join the gay strip bar : "Wizards Wands"_**

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**_mr. sandman - you are a perverted, peverted man... That's why we're such great friends! Oh, but, I don't do rape scenes. I figure that if a character wants their way with another character they should be intelligent enough to seduce them and not have to do it by force. _**

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**_silversongs - thanks I am glad you like it. I want to see them too...but I want to be able to keep them as IC as possible, so it is going to be difficult._**

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**_-little oro - YAY! Here you are!_**

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**_StephTheDuke - I hope this pleases you _**

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**_redeyeddragon - awwwww...I HEART YOU FOR LIFE! I don't think I have EVER read a Draco/Blaise hmm...I will have to look into that...thanks for the advice 3_**

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**_princesscythera - good to see you again Thanks, I hope this chapter pleases you. Yeah...the development with Blaise and Draco was supposed to be one-sided or is still...I guess...I don't really know what to do yet. But the bet will ensue as planned._**

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**_Rika'sGrayWolf - thanks XD_**

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**_Andrew-Squee - Yes...him as his darned good looks_**

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**_HikariNightengale - Thank you for reviewing as much as you have . Thanks for the advice! I have always envisioned Blaise as this sexy, sexy, sexy, sex god of sexiness so maybe that's the only reason I envision them together..._**

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**_Holly and Madison - Hi aquababy! I've missed you! How's the new HP story coming? let me know and I'll definitely check it out. Haha I am glad you like the perverted humor. oooh! Story and Glory rhyme! (if you didn't do that on purpose I feel like such a nerd haha XD) glad you like it still!_**

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**_Kindali Sidera - True...I totally would. They BETTER gift wrap and give us a...oh! a free gift! hmm. I don't know...what would a good free gift be?_**

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**_Note To Self - Hair Is The Key To The Three Ss: Success, Stardom and Sex_**

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As Draco exited the Great Hall he began to make the hamster reel in his head for ideas. All of a sudden it felt as if a light bulb went on. "That Chang girl and I have herbology together!" As Draco figured, he could deal with this situation in on of these three alluring ways. 

**Option 1 - The aggressive type - When Herbology class is over grab her hand and take her to the back of the class room and have his way with her**

**Option 2 - The sensitive type - Sweet talk the girl through the entire class whispering candy lies into her ear...then take her to the back of the class room and have his way with her**

**Option 3 - The "Renaissance Man" type - Shower her not only with affection but blind her with his extremely good looks, help her with anything she asks and maybe even be nice to Potter...THEN take her to the back of the class room and have his way with her.**

At any point, all of these pretty much ended up with the same result. 

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Cho was walking down to Herbology her mind swirling around the thoughts of the shag she had received from Potter the previous evening. She flipped her "Teen Gleam" hair behind her as if she was one of those muggle "Bratz" dolls and was greeted by her flirtatious flighty friend following. 

"OMG Cho have you SEEN Draco Malfoy today?" The blonde one squealed. 

"It's as if he is a whole new Draco! He doesn't have his hair greased back at all it's all in his eyes and he looks soooooooooooo cute!" 

"Don't you think he is cute Cho?" 

(AN - Isn't it sad these conversations really AREN'T far from real life?) 

Cho scoffed so as to not appear interested but glanced over her shoulder to eye the new and improved Draco Malfoy. 

And...her jaw dropped open. 

Draco gallivanted down to the Green House as fainting ladies kept dropping like flies as he passed (Think Conrad in Bye, Bye Birdie) He flipped his hair out of his face only for it to fall carelessly back where it was making the girls who were still conscious sigh with puppy lust. 

He left his robe open and his shirt was untucked and unbuttoned a few buttons and his tie was loose, as if he had just gotten the lay of his life. As he neared Cho and her crowd he slowed down making sure to catch Cho's eye and give her a very obvious wink and then continued through the door. 

Cho's head whipped around as if she couldn't stopped herself and she, as well as her posse followed in silence to the Green house. 

"Alright class! Today you will be crushing leaves from the Womping Willow and turning it into a tea that will cure flesh wounds. You will be paired with the closest person to the first letter of your first name, to make it fair. Alright now let's see...Harry Potter and Hermione Granger...Gregory Goyle and Hannah Abbout...Cho Chang and Draco Malfoy..." 

Draco turned and gave a very convincing innocent boy smile to Cho thinking.."This is almost too easy." He walked over where Cho was sitting and greeted her with a shy, "Hey." The most she could squeak out is a "hey" back. Probably because she was stunned by his new Loreal hair. (AN - Because he's worth it!) 

They began to work. She began mixing the potion wrong and Draco stood behind her, making sure he was pressed up and against her body and leaned over her due to the 6 inch height difference. He took her hands and leaned to talk pleasantly in her ear. "Here you go, if you do it that way that will actually _cause_ flesh wounds." Cho nodded silently, but Draco could feel the heat rising in her neck and he smirked. 

On the far end of the classroom Harry could be seen crushing his leaves so hard that they turned into a fine, fine powder. "Hey watch it you wanker!" Goyle spluttered. But Harry didn't hear him, he was too busy watching Draco...wait Draco? He meant Cho. 

"What does that bloody arse have that I don't have? Why is he hanging around my girls? I have just as much game as he does if not more, I am Harry Potter dammnit! Note the lightning scar!" 

He continued to glare at them and Draco caught a look from Harry out of the corner of his eye and chuckled to himself. 

As class came to a close Draco and Cho were the only ones able to complete the potion successfully. Since Harry had crushed the leaves to a point of no return they were overpowered by the rest of the ingredients and exploded in his face. He then turned a color of puke green and ran out to the Hospital Wing and Cho could not help but giggle. 

As they were about to leave Draco caught her hand. (He would have to save the shag until later.) And Cho told her friends to go along ahead of her and they left in a squealing, giggling, frenzy. 

"Well C-Cho." Draco stuttered in fake shyness. 

"Yes?" 

"Well the Yule Ball is coming up and I was wondering if you'd-" 

"YES!" Cho squealed, similarly to her friends and flung herself upon him. 

Draco grinned as they left the Green House together, her attached to his arm like an obnoxious fungi. 

"Like I said." He thought to himself. "Almost too easy." 

Unfortunately for Harry he caught sight of Draco and Cho's linked arms when he looked over his shoulder to see who was left in the classroom. 

"Damn Malfoy." Harry murmured angrily. "He. Will. Pay." 


	9. NTS I DESPISE All My Potions

_Hello Everyone! Well, after the EXTREMELY generous feedback I received on the last chapter I decided to start working on this one straight away! (In all my classes haha! Yay for higher education right? Alright well here you go, Chapter 9 of Note To Self!) I would have gotten this up about three days ago but Comcast had to come and fix my computer_

_AN - If I owned Harry Potter, I think I would corrupt poor innocent children (get 'em while they're young right?)_

_Reviews :_

_**GoldenMassacre - Great! I am glad you like it haha. Here is your update!**_

_**Asyu - yay pocky! haha My sister and I made a Harry Potter spoof on that song it was awesome. Hope you enjoy!**_

_**red eyed dragon - hey! Nice to hear from you again! Haha here you will find out about Harry...**_

_**Bellajen94 - Haha well I am glad I brightened your day! I hope you enjoy this chapter!**_

**_Ananas72 - Haha well here is some Harry/Draco goodness! Sorry there will be some unfortunate events for Harry in this chapter. _**

**_NatureLvrKittz - Haha thanks! I am really glad you like it. Haha I want to go figure out the name of that disease. Well I didn't want people to get too wrapped up in other couples that really won't happen. Draco's relationship with Ginny is really unimportant to the actually story. Here is chapter 9 for you!_**

**_Andrew-Squee - Haha I had seen a Loreal commercial recently and just couldn't help myself XD. _**

**_Corvin - I wish Draco was real...sighs But then I think he would get trampled by fan girls. Here's the chapter for you!_**

**_phix27 - Hey! good to hear from you again. Yeah I hate Cho, so you'll enjoy this chapter._**

**_White-Pink-Fluffy-Strawberriez -_** **_Thanks! Here is the next chapter for ya!_**

**_princess cythera - Hey! Good to "see" you again! Draco is a little pimp it's true...(Just like his father ho, ho, ho!) Thanks...I think I know what I am going to do with it now but I just want to keep going with it and see where it takes me, it has been one of my favorite stories I have written so far because normally I write poetry. Haha really? Do you work too? It was so embarrassing! I wrote this chapter down in English class ._**

**_Nina Bruchetta - Thanks hope you enjoy this chapter._**

**_teena69 - Thanks for reviewing this and my other story! That one I am having a little more trouble with. His arse DOES need to be in top condition. Yeah sure I'll read your fan fiction but I probably won't be able to until over the weekend classes are killing me...-- but I definitely will and give you feedback!_**

**_Kateg123 - Haha I am glad you like the way I portray Draco I wanted to make it as realistic as possible, no fluffy Draco for me. Here's the next chapter!_**

**_Fahzzyquill - Here you go!_**

**_Eve Granger - Haha well this is the quickest update I have ever made just for you! Glad you stuck it out and read all the chapters hope to hear from you soon!_**

**_San Francisco 49ers Girl - Thanks...Harry is going to have to take a little more of a beating though. Just for extra measure _**

**_Note To Self - If I Ever Watch An Episode of "All My Potions" I Order Me To Shoot Myself._**

Harry stamped through the Great Hall like an overgrown toddler and plopped down between Ginny and Hermione, Ron across from him.

Ron, with his mouth full, began to talk, perceiving Harry's disgruntled mood.

"Waft ish theth mafter mateth?" (AN - Ronogram Translation: What is the matter mate?)

But Harry glared at Ron with a look so menacing it reminded Hermione of the Exorcist. Ron gulped too soon at the sight of Harry's putrid face and began choking. Dean had to help him out and part of the debree smacked onto Harry's glasses.

"Today. Is. NOT. My. Day." Harry stamped out before wiping his glasses with a nearby napkin.

"Could've been worse mate." Ron gasped in between breaths. "Malfoy could be, you know, plotting some even scheme against you or something." (AN - NO of COURSE NOT)

"You will find any excuse to poke fun at Malfoy." Scoffed Hermione. "Can't you find a way to agree with him?"

"YOU were the one who punched him in 3rd year." Ron reminded her.

"W-well." Hermione stuttered. "That was a circumstantial situation."

"What's circumstantial?"

"UGH! Ron Weasley not ONLY do you have the emotion range of a teaspoon but you have the intelligence range of a shrimp fork!"

They continued bickering and Harry placed his arm around Ginny in order to feel important. His eyes lingered on the Great Hall's oak doors and saw Draco walk in with Cho. She was pasted to his arm and he had a feigned look of puppy lust on his face. Draco sat down at the Slytherin table with Cho on his lap. He whispered something into her ear and she began giggling widely.

Harry began to mutilate his food similarly to the way he had mutilated his tea leaves that morning...

Draco had gotten the opportunity, no the _pleasure_, of looking over at Harry just in time for Hermione to scold, "Harry! pretty soon you won't be able to tell the difference between your steak and your mash potatoes!"

Draco quite enjoyed Harry's little display of "The-boy-who-won't-get-laid-tonight" meal mutilation. He held Cho tightly around her waist and just to see Potter's face change to all of the colors of the angry red rainbow he slid his other hand loftily down Cho's back and rested it firmly on her bum.

Cho noticed only slightly and gave Draco a wink that certainly read: "If you keep this up you will most certainly see why Harry is so mad at you." Hopefully she would prove better than Ginny's putrid display.

"Harry...Harry! HARRY! You just smashed your goblet!" The broke one disappeared and an empty one appeared in it's place but the dribble that had splattered Harry's robes didn't disappear. He got up and stormed out of the Great Hall receiving snickers from every table (including the teachers) and right out guffaws from the Slytherins.

Anybody who had actually listed to Cho for more than 5 minutes without ogling at her body or letting their mind wander "elsewhere" would find her to be INCREDIBLY dull. He knew he was going to have to tolerate her for the next two weeks before the ball, before he dropped her like a sack of newt droppings that is.

He decided to listen to her to five minutes a day so when she drilled him with the "you never listen to me!" whining he would have something to say. However...during the rest of the twenty three hours and fifty five minutes of the day...he would spend it ogling at her body and letting his mind wander elsewhere.

These five minutes were particularly dull for today she was talking about this stupid teen soap opera called "All My Potions" where a potions master and his male student fall in love. (AN - Snarry anyone?)

"I-it was SO sad when Larry Platter said to his Potions Master as he took him into a heart felt embrace! "No matter what... you will always have to ingredients... to the potion... of my heart."!!!!!!!!!! AWWWWWW!!!!!!" She half sniffled half squealed. (AN - SORRY! I just HAD to put a Snarry spoof! It's for my sister!)

Draco nodded absent-mindedly, glancing at his snake shaped watch,counting down the seconds...4:59, 4:58, 4:57...

They parted ways because she had advanced charms with he Hufflepuffs and he had Potions with the Gryffindors.

Since the dungeon was on the other side of the grounds he arrived late after none other than 2-inch-wand Potter.

"Detention Potter." sneered Snape as the dungeon door slammed behind them both.

"Professor! Malfoy arrived even later than I did!" Harry whined before he could stop himself.

Snape looked at Malfoy with the ever so slightest look of remorse, even the Bloody Baron would consider this unfair. "You as well, Draco." Snape sighed bitterly.

Draco shot daggers in Harry's direction but Harry merely smirked as they both took their seats.

Snape did he daily routine of blocking out all of the joy and happiness in the world and shut all of the shutters and locked all of the doors. One might wonder what he does in here alone at night.

"You will be creating a sleep draught." He flicked his wand and the ingredients and method appeared on the board behind him. "This is an individual project; begin"

Draco kept noticing Harry glancing over the look at him, half seemed out of anger, the other half...almost curiosity.

By the end of class, Hermione was the only one able to create the potion perfectly. As they began leaving the class Lavender Brown and Parvarti Patil began to chatter.

"Hey, doesn't Harry kind of look like Larry from "All My Potions"?"

"Yeah! He totally does! And Snape sort of looks like an older, uglier version of the Potions Master!"

"Ooooh!"

Draco stopped dead in the hallway and shuddered. He had thought he would never have to hear those names again.

"Draco and Harry left dinner early, so as to not be late and serve a WEEK'S detention. They both entered from opposite sides of the room. Snape had not arrived yet.

They both slammed the doors behind themselves.

"Malfoy."

"Potter."

Detention had begun.


	10. NTS Lather Rinse and Repeat

**CONGRATULATIONS AND THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR GETTING ME TO 100 REVIEWS!!! I AM SO HAPPY!**

Hello Everyone! This is Chapter 10 of Note To Self. I must say this was the most intense chapter I have had to write for this story. Hope you all enjoy. 

Disclaimer - Well, you know. 

Reviews: 

**_Me! - Omg I can't believe you read this XD_**

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**_wereworlf.love - I love you Tori! Please don't tell anyone in school about this!_**

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**_fahzzyquill - Here is your update!_**

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**_MaxMizuhara - Here is your update did you really not see it coming or were you being sarcastic? haha ;;_**

**_Kateg123 - Haha I didn't really know what everyone's reaction to Snarry spoof was going to be but I thought that it was funny so I put it in. This chapter is for you so you won't have withdrawal symptoms! haha. _**

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**_GoldenMassacre - You know, I like your screen name where did you come up with it? Glad you liked it! Haha I love the word guffaw too I really wanted a place to put it in and I finally found it!_**

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**_bellajen94 - Here is the chapter! Writing's away!_**

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**_Lorna Bruchetta - Haha when I'm at school and everything is just so stressful my brain just spits out words for me. Blaise WILL be coming back I promise, but not a lot in this chapter haha. _**

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**_Andrew-Squee - I assure you this will NOT become a Snarry fan fiction haha so you don't have to worry._**

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**_WatchingFromAbove - Thanks Hope you enjoy this chapter as well!_**

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**_Corvin - Tension will reach it's peak in this chapter so I hope you enjoy! _**

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**_Teena69 - Hey nice to hear from you again! I am sorry I haven't had time to read your fan fiction yet but I will I promise! Harry is always on his period._**

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**_Eve Granger - Hello again! Here's detention for you!_**

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**_Peligro - Sorry for the cliffhanger! here is the rest!_**

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**_Lisa - Hey! I am trying to keep them in character as much as possible I'm sorry. I wanted people to see what I view as Harry's "Dark Side" I also feel that Harry is going to have to be a little OOC for the relationship to work but thanks for your input I will try harder to keep them in character from now on! (But probably not in this chapter...;;)_**

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**_little-oro - Hi! Here you go! 3 thanks for reviewing so many times._**

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**_qwac - I hope this satisfies your needs!_**

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**_ladyfallsalot - Here's another one for you. I try and update frequently. _**

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**_AN - THIS CHAPTER WILL BE VERY SHORT! I AM SORRY!!!! I NEED TO GET THIS PART OUT OF THE WAY IN ORDER TO UPDATE!_**

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** _Note To Self - I WILL NOT Lose Control, Especially When I Don't Even Look Pretty_**

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Snape arrived shortly after with what appeared to be two very old cleaning brooms and a dirty bucket with Newt-and-scum-o-way mixed with water in it. Snape tossed both Draco and Harry a rag but Draco caught his rag in one hand and Harry's in another and tossed it unceremoniously on top of Harry's head. 

"The look suits you Potter. That rag completes your positive look of a maid fit to clean my mansion in the very near future." 

"I already thought you had a rag on your head Malfoy, but it just turned out to be that putrid mop of hair on your fat skull." 

"At least I lather, rinse and repeat more that once a year, unlike you Potter. But you can't exactly wash off inferiority." 

"Why don't you just-" 

"ENOUGH." Snape boomed. "You have **one hour** to clean this potions cabinet out by hand while I'm patrolling the halls. And it had better be spotless when I get back or a week's detention will be administered. Good evening." 

**57 minutes.**

He shut and locked the door with a powerful locking charm behind him, 

Harry turned, "Did he just lock that door?" (AN- OMG TORI!!!!) 

"Of course he did you dolt, or we would just walk right out." 

"I wouldn't." Harry said indignantly. 

"Of course you would, don't lie to me Potter." 

Harry said nothing. Probably because Draco was right. 

**47 minutes.**

They began working, polishing every vile, dusting every shelf and sweeping every speck off the floor. Draco put an extra glob of Newt and Scum-o-way on the floor for Harry to slip on and he smacked into one of the desks and Harry poured a chartreuse potion on top of Draco's head that made it change colors for ten minutes like a bright, obnoxious laser light show. 

**34 minutes.**

"I can't _believe _you got me into this." Draco snarled. 

"You deserved it Malfoy, think you can get away with everything." 

"At least I have the decency to LET the girls I am dating KNOW I am cheating on them when I do it." Draco partway lied. 

Harry stopped scrubbing and threw his rag down on the floor, his face red. 

"What the fuck do you know Malfoy?" 

"Enough to get you into a lot of trouble Potter, so I'd watch your back if I were you." Why was he warning him? Draco wondered. 

**29 minutes.**

They didn't say anything to each other until the room was completely spotless. Snape hadn't come back yet so they figured they hadn't completed an hour yet. 

**5 minutes. **

Draco rolled his eyes just waiting to get out. "You are going to pay for this one Potter." He didn't even have time for his two hour shower tonight. 

Harry had been reaching a boiling point. Fuck Malfoy what did he know? How did he know about Cho and Ginny? How did he know about everything that he knew? 

Harry started shaking. "Shut. Up. Malfoy." 

Malfoy turned to Harry almost out of surprise and then that surprise turned to menace. "Make. Me. Potter." 

**3 minutes. **

Harry slammed Malfoy up against a nearby wall causing the potions to rattle around but thankfully not fall over. "What the fuck do you think you know about me Malfoy? What makes you so all high and mighty?" 

Mafloy didn't like this, he was never over powered. ever. He grabbed the arm that was holding him down and with catlike reflexes slammed Harry against the wall in a similar fashion. One hand was shoving Harry's shoulder against the wall and the other was on Harry's tie pulling him to about two centimeters away from his face. 

"I could do things to you that would drive you _mad _Potter. So get off your high horse oh so "boy who lived" you are nothing to me." 

**30 seconds.**

Harry closed one of the centimeters between them. They were only a breath apart. "Yeah...?" Harry growled. "Prove it." 

Draco tightened his grip on Harry's tie and pulled. 

**1 second.**

Snape entered and Draco immediately shoved Harry away hoping Snape didn't see. Snape didn't say anything and he surveyed the room. Seemingly satisfied, he motioned for them to leave and Harry and Draco set off in opposite directions. 

When Draco was out of Harry's hindsight he ran. "What the fuck was that?" He thought to himself. This wasn't between him and Blaise anymore, this wasn't even about a stupid bet anymore. It was about beating Potter at his own game. It was about winning. 

**And a Malfoy never loses.**


	11. NTS PMS Potter's Miserable Sexlife

** Hello Everyone! This is Suzaku's Rose back with another edition of Note To Self. RECENTLY some of my friends from school have been reading this and it was actually been really freaky for me because they actually know me... This story is a really big stress reliever for me, so now they know why I am borrowing pencils from them all the time. Here is Chapter 11 of Note To Self!**

**_Reviewers:_**

**_MaxMizurahara - Oh alright! Sorry didn't know haha, I am glad I am keeping you guessing. :). I don't know whether or not you would have expected this chapter or not._**

**_bellegen94 - Here is your more!_**

**_Andrew-Squee - Well there will be more suspense in store haha. It's hard for me just to write a chapter that ENDS. Suspense it so much more thrilling._**

**_Lord Gabrielle Riddle - Sorry Harry won't be in this chapter much. Look for him in later chapters though!_**

**_ladyfallsalot - Haha I think Draco is really in his element when he in insulting people. Glad you liked it!_**

**_princess cythera - Hello again! Are you okay?! I am sorry you got injured! I hope you feel better! I wanted to keep a contrast between the chapters, funny but then tense and them comic relief, just to keep things interesting. Hope you enjoy this chapter and I hope your leg is okay! Damn couches..._**

**_GoldenMassacre - Great to hear from you again! I love your reviews by the way they're so insightful haha glad you always have a line you like. Thanks for telling me the origin of your screen name, I do really like it. I understand the oxymoron thing, I guess that sort of makes red and gold opposites doesn't it? Yet they fit so well together, like Gryffindor. Draco is my favorite character too, I am really glad you think I do him justice :). To answer your question...I was at work (again with the children watching some insufferable child television show) and it just kind of spat out. My brain does that sometimes haha. Hope you enjoy this chapter._**

**_teena69 - If you like personal, I think you will enjoy this chapter ;). _**

**_Maddie and Lorna - Hi! Good to hear from you again! I am really glad you like it, I was actually thinking about making them kiss, but it wouldn't create the sensation of longing. I am really not a fan of love stories, this won't be one haha. Babbling is always welcome!_**

**_White-Pink-Fluffy-Strawberriez - Thanks! Hope you enjoy this!_**

**_Katie-Bear1773 - I still CAN'T believe you're reading this Kate.. . Haha story comes first before APUSH ids! Love you too babe._**

**_phix27 - Hey! What's up? How've you been? I will be a Draco fan girl with you. _**

**_NatureLvrKittz - Thanks! Hope you enjoy this chapter._**

**_Eve Granger - Here's your post!_**

**Chapter 11 - Note To Self - PMS Stand For: Potter's MISERABLE Sexlife**

****Draco fell into a restless sleep. He started having horrible dreams about Potter and unicorns...and toasters...He didn't want to talk about it. 

When he woke up that morning he was fired up to complete this bet, maybe after ten minutes or so more sleep. He yawned, closed his eyes and turned over. Suddenly, he realized there was a soft breathing next to him that wasn't his own. He opened one eye to find a shirtless Blaise lying next to him. Blaise had his arms behind his head and a slight grin on his face. 

Draco screamed. 

"WHAT THE FUCK BLAISE?!" Draco jumped up with the sheet around his lower half. He had only been wearing a pair of very scandalously clad briefs. 

Blaise laughed so hard that he was tearing up and he pulled down the comforter to show that he had been wearing dress pants the whole time. 

I...just...wanted...to...see...your face." Blaise gasped in between tears and more fits of laughter. 

Draco threw a pillow at him, still partially horrified. "How the hell did you get in here?" Draco asked incredulously. 

"Oh Draco dear you insult my intelligence. Did you really think Dumbledore takes much care in protecting the Head's rooms? More complex that "alohamora" but still...Blaise replied offhandedly. 

Blaise paused and looked as if he was pondering something. "You know...It's still early Draco, you sure you wouldn't like your eggs with a side of a nice fuck for breakfast?" Blaise cooed as he began with one hand unbuckling his belt and grinning wildly. 

Draco and Blaise were normally pretty matched in strength but this time, Blaise had the upper hand. Blaise had been up for hours; his reflexes sharp enough to sneak into Draco's bed without so much as ruffling the sheets. Draco on the hand, was still groggy from waking up no more than four minutes ago and he was on the floor in a very vulnerable position. 

To put it simply, he didn't stand a chance. 

Blaise spread out across Draco's bed in a swimsuit model-like position. His slightly shaggy, dark hair was falling carelessly into his black twinkling eyes. His taught abs were fully exposed and now his pants' button and his zipper were also undone. 

"Come back to bed Draco." Blaise called loftily in a sing song voice. 

"Not on your life." Draco retorted, only there was a slight crack in his voice, and Blaise picked up on it. 

"Aw..don't make me come over there." Blaise replied in the same tone, but now it sounded more like a motherly reprimand. He was still grinning wildly, as if he had just received a Firebolt for Christmas. 

He closed the distance between himself and Draco and within less than thirty seconds Blaise had Draco pinned; arms above his head, Blaise's knees on either side of him. The sheet had been discarded. 

Draco rolled his eyes to appear as if he was completely disinterested and unaffected. Blaise had done these types of things before but normally Draco wasn't in such a vulnerable position. Draco could feel the bulge in Blaise's pants growing. Draco knew he wasn't going to leave empty-handed. 

"You won't do it." Draco said defiantly believing in his knowledge of Blaise and possibly sheer luck. Blaise had morals, just not very high ones. He would shag a girl he had won with charm and intelligence, but never by force, it would be too easy that way. 

"Why when I could just take you now?" Blaise replied softly as he moved his lips to Draco's ear. 

"Because you have more pride than that Zambini. You hate taking things, you want to win. And won't the fuck be so much sweeter...if you win?" 

Blaise pondered this for a moment and sighed. Draco was right. Blaise was intelligent beyond mortal standards, but Draco hand the power of persuasion. 

Blaise knew that Draco would keep his word and that if he actually did win, he would get the shag of his life, not by force. 

Blaise motioned to get off of Draco but not before he took Draco's chin in his hand and kissed him full on the mouth. Draco's eyes widened; he hadn't expected that. 

Blaise then got up quickly so Draco wouldn't have time to react. Blaise turned to him as he re buckled his pants. "The shag I will have to save for later, but I have no shame in stealing that." Then, he strode out of the room, probably to go down to breakfast. 

Draco stood up and brought his index and middle fingers to his lips. There was no way he was going to let Blaise win, but there was no denying he was a damn good kisser... 

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// 

Harry awoke in a similar fashion, except his best friend didn't try to jump shag him. He had gotten so close to kissing Draco, it wasn't even funny. (**AN - YES EVERYONE, THEY DIDN'T KISS! Snape walked in too soon!**) But that wasn't going to keep Harry's eyes off the prize. He was going to have what he wanted, Draco getting in his way or not. And he was determined to do so, no matter what. 

**Sorry for the short chapter! We haven't seen Blaise for a while and I missed him! I also still haven't decided how I am going to end this story romantically. I have a pretty good idea, but I love to keep you guys guessing. The next chapter will pertain more to the plot of the story but I had to put this in here. See you soon!**


	12. NTS Best Robes Are Worn To Be Taken Off

**Sorry this chapter has taken so long to be put up. Business has been moving very fast lately it is hard to keep up with everything that is going on. This chapter is going to start things getting a little serious. There will still be humor but things are going to take a serious turn for the hero of this story...**

phix27 - Damn Snape... . (thanks for the review I hope you like this chapter) 

**Lorna Bruchetta - Thanks! . I do have a bit of a Blaise obsession, which probably comes out in this story, hope you like this chapter!**

**ladyfallsalot - Here is your chapter, as requesyed ma'am!**

**teena69 - Harry wants to humiliate Draco as much as Draco does. But there is more to the story than that, I hope this chapter makes you understand more...if you have any more questons, just ask **

**MaxMizuhara - Thanks...I think? haha hope you enjoy this.**

**princess cythera - hey! how is your balance doing? haha glad you liked that line, I thought it described them pretty well. Hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**Eve Granger - Here you go! Thanks for the cookies! **

**Andrew-Squee - Does HARRY wake up to an extremely sexy guy in his bed wearing dress pants? Haha, Go Blaise.**

**werewolf.love - I am a tad apprehensive for you to read this chapter Tori...haha see you Sunday!**

**kateg123 - Haha then you will definitely enjoy this chapter.**

**GoldenMassacre - Your reviews are always super, 3. I tried to think up some lines you might like that are in this chapter Hope you enjoy!**

**Asyu - I think you're going to like this chapter devious laugh**

**Lisa - Oh no I didn't think you were mean don't worry! haha, I actually really like constructive criticism. I hope I hear from you soon!**

**White-Pink-Fluffy-Strawberriez - yay!**

**mylAstrEqueSt.dev - I don't know who it's going to be yet.. hope you like this chapter.**

**Lunasky - doesn't end quite yet...;)**

**Note To Self - The Best Robes Are Worn To Be Taken Off**

The Yule Ball was that night. It was hard for Draco to fathom this fact. However, the torture he had to endure over the past week was more than enough of a rude awakening...

Cho had dragged Draco to sixteen different dress stores, tried on 137 different dresses and complained 1867 times that Draco didn't notice her or didn't care. 

But, you know, who's counting. 

He hadn't seen Potter since their little detention incident and Blaise was getting frisky; his arse was in jeopardy. 

He had picked out a set of dress robes for the occasion. They were a midnight black with a green trim, it was very flattering on him. 

For some reason, Draco was nervous. He knew that tomorrow night was the night he was going to have to complete his bet but he knew he would win. But since Snape's detention this had made Draco uneasy. He tried not to think about it. He was a Malfoy. Mafloys didn't have to think. 

He walked down to the Great Hall for lunch to meet Cho and she, as she normally did, attached to his arm like a parasite as they walked in together. He sat down with her and she began, once again, talking without seeming to have the need to breathe. 

Draco glanced over to look at the Gryffindor table and saw that Harry was staring at him and then struck up a conversation with Ginny. 

Draco was frusturated. NO ONE ignores a Malfoy. 

The entire day went by the same way. Even in Potions when Blaise sat next to him on one side and Potter on the other they worked in silence. It was almost as if some secret was going around that he wasn't in on. Blaise nudged him and winked. Blaise knew what was coming and if Draco didn't think quickly, Draco knew what was coming as well. 

That night Blaise came in to Draco's room, Draco was fastening his tie when Blaise grabbed on to it from behind and whirled him around. "Just wanted to wish you good luck tonight." Blaise said in a sly voice. 

Draco shrugged him off. "What's it to you?" He was fully alert now and he was not about to let what happened some previous nights ago happen again. 

Blaise left without a word. That made Draco feel even more uneasy. 

Blaise left Draco alone and shut the door softly behind him and he made his way down to the Slytherin common room. He then sat down on one of the plush deep green couches and propped his elbows up on his knees his head in his hands, thinking. 

"God damnit Draco, why the hell do you have to do this to me?" He muttered almost inaudibly. Blaise knew just as well as Draco that showing vulnerbaility was the worse crime to commit as a Slytherin male. He just wanted him so badly. Blaise had always been able to get what he wanted, no matter what. In school, with his family, with women, everything. Why was Draco so damn stubborn? 

Blaise got up, recomposed himself, and walked out. He would not be made a fool of. 

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// 

Harry was dressing in his room when someone wrapped their arms around his eyes. He turned to find Ginny grinning widely behind him. Harry sighed and kissed her lightly on the lips thinking in the back of his mind what Cho might be wearing tonight... 

Blaise and Draco walked down silently together to meet their dates. Draco couldn't even deny that Cho looked fantastic but that was not what prize he wanted tonight. He had to win. He didn't know why, he felt he wanted to fuck the living crap out of Potter and then leave him just to show him what humiliation felt like. It wasn't that Draco was a "do-gooder" he didn't even understand his need to destroy Potter's reputation. Maybe it was because of the day they first met...

_"I think I will do fine on my own thanks." (AN - Sorry I don't know the exact line.)_

_Draco drew his hand away quickly, trying to get rid of the humiliation that he felt was burning his skin. What did this boy know anyway? He was no better than him. One day, he would expose him. Make everyone hate him. Damn Harry Potter..._

Blaise seemingly showed no interest in his date. They walked in together and the loud rock music of "Toil and Trouble" was ringing in the ears of the Hogwarts students. Blaise was immeadietly dragged out on to the dance floor and Cho asked Draco to go get her some punch,

Draco seized this opportunity to get away from Cho, and possibly not come back.

Draco spotted Potter almost immeadietly. Ginny was wearing a maroon colored dress with golden jewelry adorning it, the way she looked tonight almost made up for her horrible skills in bed. almost.

Ginny was sweating slightly, it seemed to appear they were taking a break from dancing and Ginny whispered something in Harry's ear and went to go sit down next to Hermione, chatting and giggling like mad.

Harry went to the punch bowl and arrived at the same time Draco did. They locked eyes for a breif moment and both reached for the ladel at the same time. Draco grasped the end of the ladel and Harry the upper half. They glared at eachother and both released their hands.

"So where is your leech of a date." Harry asked nonchalantly. 

"I could ask the same of you and your gorilla." responded Draco with equal arrogance. 

"At least my date doesn't chew my ear off." Harry quickly responded, his anger hightening. 

"Maybe not socially, but with her terrible sexual skills I fear of what she actually might chew off of you, not that there is anything to even **nibble **on." (AN - OOH! Burn!)

Harry grasped the sleeve of Draco's jacket and took him towards a near by exit, in a short time, they were outside in the hallway of the first floor, the music was just a background away, and only laterns lit the dark halls.

"No Potter I will not sleep with you." Draco said with a smirk on his face. "The Weasley girl probably learned all of the tricks of the trade from you."

Harry moved to punch Draco in the face but Draco caught his fist easily. Harry was up against the wall in seconds, very similarly to the way he was during detention about a week ago.

"What are you going to do now Potter? None of your little peons of friends are here to save you." Draco spit out with venom pinning Harry to the wall with both of his arms.

"I'll do what I have been wanting to do since the first day I fucking met you Malfoy."

Blaise was watching in a near by nook out of the light of the latern.

"Oh yeah?" Draco asked, suddenly curious, but the words came out more like a threat. "What."

Harry reached out his hand and grabbed Draco's tie and pulled him to his face. Then Harry whispered in his ear...

"I am going to do things to you, that will drive you **mad **Malfoy."

Harry removed his mouth from Draco's ear and harshly smashed his lips into Draco's...

**TBC**


	13. NTS Room Of Requirement is Swarey of Sex

**Okay, just to let everyone know, this was the hardest chapter I have ever had to write, EVER.** **I hope you guys enjoy it. SO SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG!**

**Disclaimer- Lord GOD JK Rowling would totally NOT do this to her characters.**

**Sorry review replies are going to be really short this chapter.**

**THANKYOU FOR GETTING ME TO OVER 10,000 HITS! I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH! **

**I am also trying to get to 100 Author Alerts and 200 reviews. Right now I have 92 Author Alerts and 168 reviews. Thanks for getting me this far!**

_REVIEWS:_

_ladyfallsalot - haha I hope this is enough detail for you. Of course I would do anything for you! _

_Asyu - You will see why Harry had to kiss Draco in this chapter. I originally was going to make Draco kiss Harry but this worked out better. Hmm...Raspberry Jello_

_teena69 - Here is your "more"! Poor Blaise TT_

_bellajen94 - Here is your update sorry it took so long! Please don't kill me!_

_Corvin - WORD! (Oh god, I am so white)_

_Whisper in the wind33 - Here is your update haha_

_Kitematsu - Update :)_

_ciaobella00 - Haha I am really glad you liked it, I wrote it in class XD._

_White-Pink-Fluffy-Strawberriez - Oh don't worry there is plenty more to come :)_

_bleedingxheart - lol this is for your slash craving, it had to get a little serious, but it will be back to being light-hearted soon._

_Andrew-Squee - Haha it rhymed! that was so awesome. You deserve a kudos. Haha here is more._

_Kateg123 - Glad I made you laugh_

_MaxMizuhara - Then I really don't know if you are going to be ready for this chapter lol_

_GoldenMassacre - Haha I 3 you. I am so happy you stopped your homework for me! lol Though your teachers might not be...And as far as Harry's evil plan...you were right on the nose ;)_

_KatieBear1773 - I HONESTLY hope you won't read this chapter Kate blushes it's embarrassing! But I know you are going to ignore this and read it anyway. NOOOOOO ENGLISH!_

_NaturelLvrKittz - Thanks _

_LunaSky - Here's the update!_

_Eve Granger - Pleeeeease MILK! Mouth...So...Dry..._

_fahzzyquill - Update! And thanks _

_Maddie and Lorna - Even after this chapter it is debatable what happens to Blaise, you'll just have to see Thanks!_

_Solomon - As you wish._

_purplebunny-666 - UPDATED!_

_werewolf.love - Love you too!! 3_

_Addicted2Love - Here is your update_

_keysintertwinedinabondoffla..- Yeah I am sorry the grammar sucks . I just want to update so fast I really don't look it over too much. I hope this grammar is a little better. Hope you like it!_

_Lisa - Here you go! Sadly Blaise won't make an appearance_

_evildictionaryninja- I love your screen name! Yeah I hate cliff-hangers...yet I use them all the time. Here is your chapter!_

_MissBehavior - I love your screen name too! Here you go!_

_Note To Self - The Room Of Requirement Has Become The Swarey of Sex_

Draco's eyes widened in shock, but he didn't pull away. He racked his brain. _What _had happened the first year they met? What had happened up until now? Draco all of a sudden felt as if he was in a pensive, the word dissolved around him.

_1st year - "I think I will do fine on my own thanks." Harry retorted smoothly. As he saw the blonde stalk away he sighed. He knew it was right to be loyal to his new found friend but it that what he really wanted?_

_"You would do well in Slytherin," cooed the Sorting Hat. Harry wanted to ask why, but before he asked, he saw. Draco and him, best friends, lovers, the burn of the Dark Mark etched forever into his arm..._

_That is what scared him, and irrationally, he begged for Gryffindor, cheated fate._

_The Hat's renouncing call of "Gryffindor" rand in his ears and Harry sighed, but he didn't know if it was out of relief or if he was exhaling all that could've been, that **should've **been..._

_2nd year - Harry looked around at everyone and saw everyone turn away. He KNEW he wasn't some son of Salazar Slytherin he KNEW. WHY didn't anyone believe him? At a feeble attempt at attention, at SOMETHING, even an insult, he locked eyes with Draco. Draco didn't look away..._

_3rd year - "Potter, you **actually **fainted?" At first, Harry didn't catch the meaning in his words until Ron grabbed his shoulder and retorted, "Sod off Malfoy." Harry sighed and looked down at his plate. For a split second Harry thought Draco was ACTUALLY concerned... _

_4th year - Harry fought the Norwegian Ridgeback. He had nearly fallen and saw Draco, Crabbe and Goyle howl with laughter. Harry's lingering wisp of affection shifted from fantasy to anger..._

_5th year - Harry bumped into Draco as they simultaneously got off the train. Harry tried to glare at Draco, he honestly did, he couldn't bring himself to and he settled for staring at the ground and stalking away..._

Draco was brought back to the present. He had seen everything. All of the _could've_ beens, _**would've**_ beens, **_should've_** beens.

Draco closed his eyes...and kissed Harry back.

As soon as Harry felt the slightest touch of a positive reaction, he began going at full force. He pushed Draco even farther up against the wall and slowly let go of Draco's tie. He began to run one of his hands up Draco's chest to his neck and up the back of his neck and tangled his hand in his hair, pulling Draco as close to him as he possibly could muster.

Draco took the more aggressive approach and slid his hand down to Harry's belt buckle. He pulled Harry's pelvis closer to him with one hand and with the other, he took his wand out of his pocket. He flicked it and the room behind them opened immeadietly and they slid quickly inside.

Draco muttered a lock charm in between kisses and suddenly realized they were in the Room of Requirement. He saw there were many options to his advantage: An enormous bed, a ridiculous amount of candles and a hard rock song playing in the background.

Draco slowly moved Harry up against one of the bed posts. At this point he moved is lips away from Harry's. He kissed the line of his jaw and down his neck and bit each of his shirt buttons open with his teeth.

As he reached the last button he heard Harry surrender the slightest moan to him. Draco took this opportunity of weakness to take part of Harry's belt into this mouth, undo it, and did away with it. Draco then kissed his way back up and started so suck on Harry's neck, making sure that he would receive questions the next morning.

Harry messily began unbuttoning Draco's shirt when Draco finally just broke the kiss and ripped it off himself.

"So I suppose even the Boy Who Lived has some deep dark secrets." Draco breathed huskily into Harry's ear.

"And I suppose Slytherin's Prince is even up to getting his hands dirty once in a while." Harry replied lustily.

"Let me show you just how dirty." Draco whispered, and closed the gap.

**TBC...**


	14. NTS Always Wear Presentable Boxers

_I am so incredibly sorry that I have not written in so long. I can not explain the horrors that have plagued me over these past couple of months. I am currently ill and staying home from school and I just had this nagging urge to continue because this is one of my most favorite stories. I am afraid that I do not have time to answer all of the reviews I have received since because I honestly do not remember but I will be writing review replies for the next chapter. Thank you all for sticking with me and here is the newest chapter of: NOTE TO SELF!_

**Note to Self - When Going On A Date Always Wear Presentable Boxers, You Never Know Just WHAT Could Happen**

Draco awoke promptly at noon that Saturday morning. He turned over trying to regain some sort of sleep but to no avail, ten hours of sleep and he was done. As he opened his large mouth (similar to the way he did last night) he yawned loudly and suddenly felt a weight on the bed that was not his own.

He turned to see a very oddly placed but an extremely sexy looking black haired boy lying in his bed. Draco only took a glance and it did not register just who this boy was. "Hmm...good turn out." Draco thought to himself, pleased that his prize was moderately attractive due to the intoxicated state he was the night before.

(Much better than when he woke up to find that disgusting 4th year Hufflepuff in his bed, God, she didn't leave him alone for WEEKS until he finally convinced her that she was simply a figment of her imagination and she should look to some other form of love...like a unicorn or...something...(Hufflepuffs are so gullible)).

Draco absentmindedly turned back over to brush the hair out of his prize's face. When he did he stopped. His breath became suddenly ragged. He turned straight on his back and sweat began to quickly accumulate on his brow.

For what he had seen was a distinct lightning shaped scar on his catch of the day's forhead.

For Draco, there was only a few things he could think on this subject at the moment:

"SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK SHIT FUCK SHIT FUCK SHIT SHIT FUCK."

"I fucked Harry Potter."

Draco wasn't aware that he had been whispering this out loud until he felt something scoot closer to him and a husky voice whisper in his ear."

"And you fucking loved it too."

Draco, at a feeble attempt to catch his breath made an attempt to respond. "And what makes you so sure of that?"

"Well, considering you drank so much booze eight elephants could have been drunk on what you had, you're good at holding your liquor though, and I merely had two drinks my memory serves me a tad better than yours Draco."

"Don't call me that." Draco spat quickly. Something in the way that Potter said his name triggered something in his mind...or rather his loins as he managed to capture a glimpse of a memory from the night before...

_Harry was trailing kissed down Draco's chest. He reached the button of his pants and ripped it open with his teeth. "P-potter. P-potter." Draco managed to get out but this was not good enough for Harry. He began kissing all around his member, barely touching, it was so much Draco could hardly bear it."_

_"Say it Draco."_

_"No."_

_Harry kissed the very endpoint of Draco's abdomen. "Say it."_

_"N-no."_

_Harry very inhaled and slow let the air out over Draco's member. "Say it Draco."_

_Draco could not take it anymore. "HARRY!"_

The only thing that managed to bring Draco back from the inner workings of his mind was Harry nibbling on his earlobe. He tried to get out a nasty comment but all that managed to come to his throat was a low "direct from the loins" moan. Harry chuckled and bit down causing Draco to gasp as he could feel his tender ear bruising.

"How does it feel to be dominated by a sexier man Malfoy?"

Then something triggered in Draco's head. One could insult Draco's intelligence, his family, his money, his strange appearance as a ferret in their fourth year...but SEXIER? SEXIER?! No one. NO ONE. Was sexier than Draco Malfoy.

Draco feigned a submissive state for about half a second longer and turned to Harry as if he was about to kiss him. Harry, taking the bait, forgot all about dominating Draco and simply about going another round. Draco took this opportunity gently grab Harry's wrists.

Draco suddenly thrust Harry down on the bed pinning his wrists harshly above his head. "If you think you are in any way superior to me Potter, you are wrong. Dead. Wrong."

"Oh really? That's not what you said last-"

Draco would not hear anymore of this and his lips came crashing down onto Harry's. Harry tried to fight it, merely out of spite but Draco forced Harry's lips open with his tongue, exploring every crevice, every millimeter. He wanted to show Potter he was not to be dominated. Harry finally turned to the side gasping for air but Draco was not finished. He began to attack Harry's neck, not just nipping, but biting with such force that bruises began to appear immediately. Finally, Harry was able to regain his senses and thrust Malfoy off of him.

"You. Don't. Intimidate Me. Mafloy." Harry managed to say while pinning Draco in a similar fashion that he had been in only a moment before.

"Fuck you Potter." Draco spat.

"You already did."

Draco was about to respond when there was a rapid knock on the door.

Draco could only think few words on the matter at hand:

"SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT FUCK FUCK FUCK SHIT FUCK SHIT FUCK SHIT SHIT FUCK." (As one can see, Draco's mind is not very complex in high stress situations.)

Only one other person came up here at this hour.

"OOOH DRACEY POO!!" Came the loud shrill that Draco had been waiting for.

"Who the hell is th-" Harry started but Draco cut him off.

"You have to get out of here!" Draco pulled Harry up by the arm with an incredible force he didn't know he had and quickly opened his window.

"You have to jump!"

"Are you NUTS?!" Harry said incredulously.

Draco then pushed him out the window. About a half second later Draco realized the sex was too much to risk and through the broom stick he kept in his room after him.

If anyone else but Harry Potter was pushed out that window they most likely would have died, but Harry's superior Quidditch skills caused him to catch the broom stick and managed to get to a reasonable flying height and out of where he was.

One second later Pansy busts into Draco's room and throws her arms around him. "Good afternoon Dracey poo! It's one o'clock! Normally you only sleep until noon!"

But Draco wasn't listening, he looked out the window quickly to make sure Potter didn't die and saw him fly to the Gryffindor Tower...in his Snitch Boxers.

Draco could not keep from busting out laughing and Pansy looked at him incredulously. "What are you laughing at?" Pansy said, examining herself to make sure he was not laughing at her.

"N-nothing I just saw...a um...I just saw...a... swallow." Draco said, trying to find something as close to the truth as possible. (AN - PUN INTENDED!)

"What is so funny about swallows?"

"Nothing, would you like to go get some breakfast with me?"

Pansy was easily distracted and nodded profusely."Don't you mean lunch?"

"Whatever let's go."

Fred and George were up unreasonably early for themselves as they walked out onto the Quidditch pitch. They had skipped class and slept all day yesterday so now they were awake and thought it would be a good time to throw a Bludger around. Fred and George, in the midst of getting their business started decided to come back for a year and coach the Gryffindor Quidditch Team. Fred heard a scream and looked up.

"What the bloody hell was that?"

They looked to see the Boy Who Lived flying almost naked across the pitch.

"You think it was a bird?" George asked.

"Maybe a plane?" Fred replied.

They both looked at each other, amused at their little joke.

"So what type of torturous methods do you think we can use to get poor little Harry to spill why he is taking an early afternoon flight almost comando?" George asked.

Fred pointed his want up towards the sky. "Snaptineous Pictalous!"

A Polaroid shot out of Fred's wand which had a very nice picture of Harry, looking behind him nervously because his boxers had been ripped in three places.

"I can think of a few things..." Fred trailed off wickedly.

They decided that Quidditch would have to wait, mischief was afoot and they weren't about to pass that up.

Thank you so much everyone! Please R and R!


	15. NTS Snakes Bite You in the Ass

_**Thank you all so much who have not given up on me and came back to read the rest of this...interesting fan fiction! I am going to try to update a lot more so hopefully this chapter was earlier than expected! Here are your guys review responses:**_

_**Paddy Waddy - Thank you very much! I hope my chapters no longer impale you! I will buy you a desk cushion! **_

_**DerangedxandxSarcastic - Well I am happy that you didn't have to wait for too long, hope you enjoy!**_

_**Evil M - Thank you! Haha oh boy well I truly do love the twins and I wanted to put them in somehow... they might play a bigger role than expected...Pansy IS a stalker!**_

_**Forsaken Elf - My dearest love! Haha here is more loin writing. Haha and I love a little hypocrisy between us lovers ;)**_

_**werewolf.love - I LOVE YOU TOO TORI! haha thanks Queer as Folk! ASAP!**_

_**Luna Sky - Thank you for staying with me! 3**_

_**MissBehavior - Aw thank you! There is more where that came from! Hopefully my updates will be more frequent. I love Blaise too, I feel selfish because I feel like I am writing him with my own devious purpose in mind...here is the next chapter and the next one will becoming soon hopefully.**_

_**GoldenMassacre - I am so glad to hear from you again! Thank you again for the favorite quotes that is always my favorite I am always curious to see what you think. I hope I didn't keep you waiting too long. Thank you! Much love!**_

_**A Forgotten Lover - Aw thanks! Glad you like it, I need something sarcastic to keep me from the dull, blunt boredom of school...Thanks! My love to you too!**_

_**ThatRosie Sparkle - Here is "MOAR"! 3**_

** Chapter 15**

**Note To Self - When in the presence of fellow Gryffindors, beware of the appearance of snake wounds, it might come around to "bite you in the ass" (once again)**

As Harry flew across the sky towards Gryffindor Tower he felt a harsh wind in his crotch area and was suddenly aware of the holes he had torn in his boxers. As he examined this he wasn't paying attention to where he was flying...

And ran smack into the window of the boy's corridor.

Fred an George were already by the window, snickering, debating how long they would stall before opening the window, if they would open it at all.

"Oi Harry!" Fred called loud enough for Harry to hear him through the glass.

"How's it hanging?" George chimed in, eyeing Harry's holy boxers with obvious innuendo.

"Would you guys let me in?!" Harry exclaimed. "It's bloody damn cold out here!"

"Certainly." George grinned at his brother.

"With pleasure." Fred replied, stifling another laugh.

They let poor Harry and his appendages dangle for another few minutes, shaking with so much laughter neither could reach the latch. Harry finally let out a growl of rage but it only caused them to go into another fit of laughter until finally George undid the latch before collapsing on the floor.

Harry flew in and Fred and George ducked while Harry plopped unceremoniously onto his bed, his broom stick discarded. He flopped out his limbs and before he could exhale Fred and George were on either side of him.

"Jolly good show you put on out there Harry, We couldn't have done it better ourselves." George said cheerfully.

"Well, if we did, would have worn better boxers." Fred snickered.

George walked over to the discarded broom stick so he could lay it up against the wall. However, when he picked it up he knew there was something peculiar about it. He turned it over in his hands, looking at it with hard, curious eyes. His finger ran over the mahogany and felt for the small lion carving that was in the handle of every Gryffindor broomstick, only to find a serpent etched in it's place.

"Harry! This is a Slytherin broomstick!" George shouted. Feeling betrayed that Harry would even touch a Slytherin broomstick. He dropped it suddenly, as if it had burned him and it fell to the ground with a loud thud.

"Ooh, what pray tell have you been doing riding a Slytherin broomstick?" Fred asked slyly with a wink.

"Just...went into the wrong closet when getting a broom, that's all." Harry said indignantly.

"Our closets are bright gold! How could you _possibly _ miss it you've been on the Quidditch team since first year!" George exclaimed kicking the broomstick across the floor.

Harry began to think quickly, he didn't have many options. "Why would I want to mess up a Gryffindor broomstick?" Harry said in a tone about three octaves higher than he meant to, revealing his lie.

"Harry would have never pulled this stunt alone..." Fred trailed off slowly.

"Why didn't you ask us Harry? Who is better than us?" George said, feeling betrayed.

"Because I wasn't pulling a prank!" Harry shouted frustrated, then regretted it.

Fred and George stopped their banter immediately and both looked to Harry at the same time.

"You guys have to stop doing that, it's creepy." Harry remarked.

"Then what _were _you doing?" They both accused in unison, ignoring Harry's comment.

"I was...sneaking out." Harry said trying to stick as close to the truth as humanly possible since his lying skills weren't exactly up to par with the twins.

"From where?" George whispered, this little ruse captivating his interest. He sat on the bed and looked into Harry's eyes intently, trying to read him.

Fred noticed Harry rubbing his neck absentmindedly and pried Harry's hand off of it.

"Fred! Let me-"

"WOAH, did you get mauled by a bear?!" Fred exclaimed.

"Or a...snake?" George added slowly, raising an eyebrow, putting the pieces together.

Harry answered their question by falling silent.

Fred and George grinned and each other wickedly. "Hell yes!" they chanted together.

Harry looked at them in shock.

"Let me explain Harry, forging friendships with Slytherins is an impossible task but next to Gryffindors of course they are the best shag around!"

"Angry sex is the key to happiness..." Fred trailed off wistfully.

"We don't let ickle Ronnikins in on this for his poor virgin ears might suffer." George in a tone that was shockingly similar to Mrs. Weasley.

"But we have had our fair share of Slytherin shags...just to keep things interesting." George winked at Harry.

Fred and George both looked at Harry's stunned face and each clasped a hand to his shoulder.

"I always knew he was one of us!" George sniffed.

"A triplet!"

Harry groaned. This is not he had wanted OR expected.

"So who was it Harry?" George asked, his eyes burning with curiosity.

Before he had time to attempt to scrounge up another lie Ron busted in with his mouth full of Twinkie.

"Wff tooth cm dowg to wunfch wif Hermione and mf?

Harry looked at him incredulously. "What?"

Ron took a big swallow and burped. "I said, do you want to come down to lunch with Hermione and me?"

"YES." Harry said a bit too exuberantly and shuffled out the door before the twins could protest.

The twins were still sputtering behind him and he didn't quite know why until Ron made a comment.

"Um...Harry?" Ron asked his face turning red.

"What is it Ron?"

"Do you want to um...I mean...don't you want to put some clothes on?"

Harry looked down to see he was still wearing his shredded boxers.

"Bloody hell! Harry groaned and dashed back upstairs. He stepped over the twins who were rolling on the floor and retrieved a set of clothes from his drawer. He quickly went to the bathroom, threw them on and was downstairs with Ron in less than 3 minutes.

"Woo! That was fun!." Fred said wiping the tears from his eyes as Harry slammed the door behind him.

"Indeed, that is something we must do more often." George replied.

"Well, we might as well head back down to the Quidditch pitch, nothing more to see here and we have to set up for tonight's practice." George said.

"Righto, we might want to bring that broomstick with us, lest Snivlley think we stole it."

"Oh but that is _so _not like us!" George gasped like a batty old woman. "That would be positively criminal!"

"Criminal!" Fred agreed in the same tone.

George went to go pick up the broom stick that he kicked across the floor. He noticed another small carving opposite the serpent and realized this wasn't an ordinary run of the mill Slytherin broom stick. It was made of finer wood, and it had been personalized.

George looked at the smaller carving that he hadn't noticed before. His eyes went wide. "Fred! look at this!"

"What?" Fred leaned over and his eyes went wide as well. They both looked at each other, a wicked grin creeping to their faces.

"Well, this changes everything." They said in unison.

George hooked the broom stick with the initials "D.M." behind his shoulder and they walked out.

_Please R and R_


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